Pizzaonian monks enjoy a moment of reflection at Elephant Rock Point
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
FROM: MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE
Contact: Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM
SUBJECT: Headmaster Brother Giovanni proclaimed as Supreme Pizzaonian
In a surprise announcement today the Sacred Order of International Pizza Monks proclaimed Pizzaonian monk, Brother Giovanni as the new Supreme Pizzaonian, and spiritual leader of all Pizzaonians everywhere.
This unexpected move was motivated by the extraordinary leadership Brother Giovanni has demonstrated during the stressful and dramatic reorganization of the Pizzaonian Order.
The rise of Brother Giovanni has been spectacular on two fronts. First, he is the first portalized monk to achieve such a prestigious position. Like Brother Franco, both were invited to portalize to the beta-world after the sudden realization that their lives seemed like they were in a Woody Allen movie. Pizzaonians will fast track anyone with this symptom through the portalization process.
Second, both Brother Giovanni and Franco expected to spend the rest of their lives as kitchen helpers at the monastery. To have risen so quickly from such unpretentious beginnings is in of it self spectacular.
It is widely anticipated Brother Franco will be named the new headmaster of the Order. When this appointment is confirmed it will be the beginning of a new time for Pizzaonians everywhere.
The new leadership will be confronted with the controversy over fan free agency for all Pizzaonians as well as the issues of illegal portalization and the complete implementation of the “faith option” in the Order’s health plan.
More as it develops.
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