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Pizzaonian spiritual, business and marketing powers all transferred to Supreme Pizzaonian

Painting by Pizzaonian Painter, Fernando Cyano (copied from a photograph)

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Pizzaonian spiritual, business and marketing powers all transferred to Supreme Pizzaonian

 

In an unprecedented move all powers of the Pizzaonian Order have been given unconditionally to Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni. In a unanimous vote, the International Conference of Pizza Monks gave all powers, spiritual and temporal, to their newly elected leader.

 

Since in the beta-world religious orders make no attempt to disguise they are also thriving business entities, Brother Giovanni’s new powers include the direction of all business and marketing decisions regarding the prospering Miracle Pizza Products, as well as all related issues.

 

The two priorities facing Brother Giovanni now are solidifying the growing and very profitable partnership with pizza conglomerate, Pizza digogo DiVinci, and his direction of the emerging, new ecumenical spirituality that is at the heart of the revitalization efforts of the Pizzaonian movement.

 

Other issues that will need Brother Giovanni’s attention are the need for fan free agency in the Pizzaonian Football League and his continuing efforts to make sure the removal of the “don’t ask, don’t tell, policy regarding women monks is accepted by all the Pizzaonian monasteries.

 

Since the Pizzaonian movement no longer represents a single spiritual or religious tradition, the new look of the Pizzaonian movement is to embrace all traditions and faiths. This new openness is at the heart of the increased applications from men and women hoping to become novice Pizzaonians.

 

So far Brother Giovanni continues to have wide support from the rank and file monks, and at this point his immigrant, portalized background allows him to be open to all possibilities. 

 

More as it develops ……

Pizzaonians sign Bretolini Farvi to play for the Cougars.

 Painting by Pizzaonian artist, Ponzi Mozzarelli 

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FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Pizzaonians sign Bretolini Farvi to play for the Cougars.

 

In a surprise announcement that caught the Pizzaonian football world by complete surprise, Lomvinci Bardi, Cougar coach, signed the aging but competent quarterback of the Pizza digogo Bakery Academy Cadets, Bretolini Farvi, to play for the Pizzaonian Cougars next season.

 

“He still has some football left in him and after our strong showing last season; Farvi may be just what we need put us over the top.  This is also a chance to prove to the rest of the beta-world that we do more than make the best pizzas in either world,” said Bardi.

 

Farvi has become a legend at the Academy, leading the Cadets to ten Pizzaonian League championships. However, he still has his critics that claim his best years are behind him.

 

Either way, this signing will continue to fuel the reports that the monastery Cougars are building a championship team.  This plus the anticipated ruling of free agency for fans that Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni is now considering, will keep the sports news on the front page for some time.

 

Pizzaonians to market Pizzaonian Margarita Pizza as the purest, organic pizza produced.

Monastery gardens adjacent to diary pastures 

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FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

SUBJECT: Pizzaonians to market Pizzaonian Margarita Pizza as the purest, organic pizza produced.

Pizzaonian Bakery Chief Sister Veronica, who rose to fame with her discovering of the Brother Timothy miracle pizza apparitions, claimed today the mozzarella cheese now being produced from the monastery dairy herds is the richest and creamiest mozzarella ever made. 

She attributes this to the reduced cattle flatulence produced by the herds when the monastery decided to apply for the coveted “es” designation administered by the ICPM.  In order to be awarded this rare designation, the monastery had to cut in half all ammonia and nitrogen emissions released by their cows.  After a long and persistent effort, this was successfully accomplished at the end of last year.

“There is no doubt about it, our cheese is the creamiest mozzarella ever made. Our new Pizzaonian Margarita Pizza is the purest organic pizza produced in the beta-world,” said Sister Veronica.

An added and very pleasant side benefit is the reduced aroma now coming from the monastery cattle pastures.

 

 

Brother Franco to dedicate the Miracle Margarita Pizza to all Pizzaonians: First letter to the Pizzaonians

Storm clouds on the Pizzaonian horizon

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FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Brother Franco to dedicate the Miracle Margarita Pizza to all Pizzaonians:  First letter to the Pizzaonians

 

My fellow and beloved Pizzaonians,

 

I am proud and honored to be your new headmaster.  I am pledged to serve you and to never lose sight of the Pizzaonian mission to discover our humanity in the creative symbol of Pizza.

 

To that end I ask you to stand firm in your belief.  We live in a perilous time and find ourselves challenged to defend our moral and spiritual principles. As our beta-world becomes more connected to the real world, we face the ultimate test of our faith.

 

I am convinced that portalization is inevitable. Our challenge is to be true to our ecumenical concepts despite the pervasive influence of the narrow and myopic views of our real world neighbors.

 

To that end we must simplify our beliefs so that we can be more persuasive in our example of holy and humanistic life styles.  To accomplish this I will focus our attention and energy on the production of the most simple and elegant pizza of them all, the Margarita

 

Our Miracle Margarita is an inspired food handed to us by our Creator.  In our alliance with Pizza digogo DiVinci and the inspirational direction of our advertising agency, John Frank Associates, I know we are moving with the hand of Providence on the tiller.

 

We are blessed by the support of our brother monk and Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni.  We pray that our Creator will continue to bless his inspired leadership.

 

The road ahead will be hard and I will ask for sacrifice from all Pizzaonians including myself.  However, we are blessed with the presence of our Miracle Pizzas as a reminder of our providential mission.

 

My blessing upon all Pizzaonians everywhere.

 

Brother Franco

Brother Franco to focus on marketing and education to promote miracle pizza products

A new day for Pizzaonian Monks 

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

FROM:  PIZZAONIAN MONASTERY OFFICE OF PUBLIC RELATIONS

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT:  Brother Franco to focus on marketing and education to promote miracle pizza products

 

Today as expected, the Pizzaonian Monks announced Brother Franco as the new headmaster of the primary Pizzaonian Monastery.  Brother Franco lost no time in setting his agenda for what he called “the dawn of a portalized economy”.

 

“I will leave the absurdity of politics to those most equipped to deal with it.  My mission is to embrace the Pizzaonian mission with complete dedication and to emphazise the spiritual and material aspects of pizza as a human experience,” said Brother Franco.

 

To help expedite their mission, the Pizzaonians have cemented their relationship with John Frank Associates as their primary marketing agency.  Reliable sources have informed us that Brother Franco is very pleased with the agency selection.

 

We can expect a flurry of changes in the very near future.  Brother Franco is well known as a “futurist” amongst his colleagues and seems to have the blessing of the new Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni.

Message to President Obama from the Supreme Pizzaonian

Pizzaonian skylights remind Pizzaonians that the future can only be seen from the present

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FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

SUBJECT:  Message to the President from Supreme Pizzaonian

Dear President Obama,

I am sure it will seem presumptuous for a religious leader from the beta-world to attempt to give advice to the leader of your free world, however my spiritual responsibilities demand that I do.

We are able to watch events in your world through our Pizzaonian News Service and their portalized digital feed.  While I have my hands full trying to lead my world, I watched with fascination your rise to the Presidency.

It was clear to me from the beginning that you are a true visionary.  It is very exciting to see in a president, the intellectual leadership that can grasp the future and its pressing demand for action that you so obviously do possess.  However, as so often is the case in our beta-world, our greatest strength is also our greatest weakness.

As in my world, health care, banking and monetary reorganization, energy reform, restructuring and preparing your nation for the world that is emerging are all urgent priorities.  However, as vital as these priorities are, they are not the priorities.

Jobs and economic stability are the only issues now.  Courageously, you dealt with the crisis of economic stability decisively and no matter the critics, the people understood it had to be done.  Unfortunately, after such bold and decisive action, the waters became very murky.

In all due respect Mr. President, your country is still in the emergency room and is beginning to hemorrhage badly. Forgive me for stating the obvious, but the only action that will stabilize the patient at this point is jobs.

And when we say jobs, we mean jobs of today, not the jobs that clearly will emerge from the new industries of tomorrow, but today’s jobs today. 

What the patient needs now to survive are workers with picks and shovels, hammers and saws, workers who drive bulldozers, workers who build bridges and repair highways, workers who run the machines that still exist in our factories, and all the workers needed for the ancillary jobs that spin off from these activities.

Granted your speeches are eloquent, but your people need to see you by their side, in the offices, at the worksites, in the union halls, working for them and struggling with them.  When that happens, your gifted leadership will take care of everything else.

Our prayers and best wishes are with you, Mr. President, your world needs for you to succeed.  But may I humbly remind you, that sometimes we have to postpone the future in order to save the present.

Brother Giovanni, Supreme Pizzaonian.

Pizza digogo pledges support for Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni

Pizzaonian faith sky as seen from Monastery Chapel

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Pizza digogo pledges support for Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni

 

Today Giorgio DiAugustino, resident monastery manager for pizza conglomerate, Pizza digogo DiVinci, pledged their support for the new Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni.

 

“We could not be more pleased.  Brother Giovanni has demonstrated his visionary leadership for the Pizzaonian movement and his support of “faith and Pizza” as a new spiritual direction is unequivocal.  Not only is he good for Pizzaonian Monks, he is also good for business”, said Mr. DiAugustino

 

Brother Giovanni’s quick response to such issues as free agency for fans, his opposition to “don’t ask, don’t tell” for women monks, and his strong support of Brother Franco’s  new education requirements for novice monks to include three additional years of training at the Pizza digogo Bakery Academy, has gained him much support from the rank and file as well.

 

Sometime soon, we expect to hear about the pending appointment of Brother Franco as the new monastery headmaster.   When that happens, it will complete this rags to riches story of two portalized monks who began their religious journey as kitchen helpers.

Pizzaonian world is rocked to its core by new Supreme Pizzaonian.

 FAITH SYMBOL OF PIZZAONIANS TO BE TESTED

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FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT:  Pizzaonians to embrace all traditions.  Pizzaonian world is rocked to its core by new Supreme Pizzaonian

 

In a stunning announcement Supreme Pizzaonian, Brother Giovanni pronounced to all the beta-world today that the Pizzaonians would no longer be committed to one denomination or religious tradition. 

 

“Being a Pizzaonian is bigger than a single religious or spiritual faith.  History calls us to move on to a bigger world and to embrace the love, justice, mercy and faith that defines the Pizzaonian mission”  When we embraced Pizza as the loving symbol of the Pizzaonian Creator we no longer had a choice but to embrace all spiritual traditions as part of the Pizzaonian divine plan”,  proclaimed Brother Giovanni.

 

While most of the Pizzaonian world was shocked, many rallied to the Supreme Pizzaonians defense.  However, his critics were quick to point out that his background as a “portalized Pizzaonian” made it impossible for him to understand the true faith of Pizzaonianism and his leadership would destroy the order as they knew it.  “His lack of experience and understanding of our life in the beta-world is the problem” said Brother Joseph, the emerging leader of a vocal and determined opposition.

 

For those not familiar with the recent history of the order, Brother Joseph, was rejected by the ICPM as permanent headmaster of the order because of his discrimination against bald headed monks. His history as always been the obedient monk, however, this caustic criticism of Brother Giovanni may change that soon.

 

We have been told this is not the last of the surprises.  The Order is planning a news conference soon to lay the many changes ahead for the Pizzaonian world.

 

More as it develops.

Pizzaonians to make PIZZA the unifying spiritual symbol for all worlds

 Abstract Pizzaonian symbol for spirituality
 

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Pizzaonians to make PIZZA the unifying spiritual symbol for all worlds

 

It is anticipated with both excitement and trepidation that Brother Giovanni will make major changes as Supreme Pizzaonian.  “We will know more tomorrow” says Publicio Relationio, Monastery Director of News and Information.

 

Since Brother Giovanni’s surprise appointment as Supreme Pizzaonian, rumors are everywhere as to what to expect with tomorrow’s announcement. Sources tell us he will extend to all peoples everywhere, Pizza as the unifying, spiritual symbol for all worlds to embrace. 

 

 If so, tomorrow’s announcement will begin a period of radical change for all Pizzaonian Monks. 

 

More as it develops.

Headmaster Brother Giovanni proclaimed as Supreme Pizzaonian

Pizzaonian monks enjoy a moment of reflection at Elephant Rock Point

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

FROM:  MONASTERY PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE

Contact:  Publicio Relationio at the Monastery office of Public Relations at   http://GIOVANNIANDFRANCO.COM

 

SUBJECT: Headmaster Brother Giovanni proclaimed as Supreme Pizzaonian

 

In a surprise announcement today the Sacred Order of International Pizza Monks proclaimed Pizzaonian monk, Brother Giovanni as the new Supreme Pizzaonian, and spiritual leader of all Pizzaonians everywhere.

 

This unexpected move was motivated by the extraordinary leadership Brother Giovanni has demonstrated during the stressful and dramatic reorganization of the Pizzaonian Order.

 

The rise of Brother Giovanni has been spectacular on two fronts.  First, he is the first portalized monk to achieve such a prestigious position.  Like Brother Franco, both were invited to portalize to the beta-world after the sudden realization that their lives seemed like they were in a Woody Allen movie.  Pizzaonians will fast track anyone with this symptom through the portalization process.

 

Second, both Brother Giovanni and Franco expected to spend the rest of their lives as kitchen helpers at the monastery.  To have risen so quickly from such unpretentious beginnings is in of it self spectacular.

 

It is widely anticipated Brother Franco will be named the new headmaster of the Order.  When this appointment is confirmed it will be the beginning of a new time for Pizzaonians everywhere.

 

The new leadership will be confronted with the controversy over fan free agency for all Pizzaonians as well as the issues of illegal portalization and the complete implementation of the “faith option” in the Order’s health plan.

 

More as it develops.