"Pizzaonia Emerging" Courtesy of the Pizzaonian Newsertainment Network, Abe Straction, curator
“It is the nature of your political opposition to create a crisis – if they didn’t they would cease to exist.” Pizzaonius
I would like to add this variation – Cable newsertainment networks would cease to exist without a crisis to report and pontificate over each hour of the day and night.
Can you imagine a world today without news networks –or better yet imagine a news network that didn’t have to make a profit but was devoted exclusively to bringing you the most accurate news possible? Sleep well Edward R Murrow; you were the last of a kind.
You knew news networks were different when auditions for new talent, particularly female, required sitting on a stool with your legs crossed. Somehow the headlines didn’t seem to be as significant as they used to be.
Add to that a series of men and women hired for their gravitas and ability to speak to the camera directly with an imposing glance that makes every word sound newsworthy even though most of it is babel.
I didn’t intend this but suddenly it seems like I’m describing the Fox News Network (Sorry, I couldn’t resist that.) You can hardly take Fox news to task since it seems to be what people want to watch. While no one was looking, news networks became Newsertainment Networks.
So now we see all networks adding what I would call a touch of the Fox magic to all of their programming. How can you fault them when we the public are willing to watch – and the number of people ready to watch obviously pays the bills?
Now if you’re going to get people to watch every minute since news is currently broadcast on television and radio 24 hours a day you better have something to say. Nothing gets the public’s attention like a crisis – real or imagined. So each day we listen to a bunch of people sitting on stools with their legs crossed proclaiming that the sky is falling at least once every hour.
To show you how dumb we the public must be, we not only listen and watch, we are willing to endure the pontificating of so-called experts around the table who are asked ridiculous questions and often give even more ludicrous answers.
I guess that’s why Diverti Mento, editor emeritus of the “The Pizzaonian” would say to all his reporters as they went on assignment each day “find me a crisis, and if you can’t find one make one up that’s believable.”
With that thought in mind two Thomas Jefferson quotes come to mind:
"Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost."
Thomas Jefferson to Dr. James Currie, January 28, 1786
"Nothing can now be believed, which is seen in a newspaper. (Television News)* Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle."
Thomas Jefferson to John Norvell, June 11, 1807
Good-luck America – you’re going to need it.
Brother Franco – reporting for “The Pizzaonian” a division of the Pizzaonian Newsertainment Network
*my insertion
OPD 11/15
